Rule #18: Beware of Dog

As new parents, Andrew and I have seen our fair share of poo over the past eight weeks. We've cleaned it off carpet at 2:30 in the morning, off lampshades and photos of grandparents, and even off of a guest's sweater (followed by profuse apologies). So when we smell or hear Evie make a dirty diaper it really does not phase us anymore.

Maggie, on the other hand, still has the power to shock me. Earlier this week I was taking her to the groomer. I scheduled this appointment before Evie was born and before a 9:00 am outing with a baby and a dog sounded like a very bad idea. We were running pretty late and both Evie and Maggie were complaining about the trip. Maggie kept running to her crate, rather than get in the car, and Evie (who has no say in being in or out of the car) was crying. On top of that, it was pouring down rain. I finally got Maggie on her leash and took her out for a quick bathroom break before whisking her into the car.

I was very stressed about the rain and Evie crying, so I didn't notice at first that Maggie had moved from her usual spot in the front seat to the back. I did, however, begin to smell something that made me think I was driving past a clump of fresh manure. When the smell did not abate and Maggie would not move back to the front seat I began to get suspicious. Sure enough, there was a large pile of Maggie poo in my passenger seat. I pulled over, grabbed an empty Target bag, and knowingly littered for the first time in my life. Quite sure that I had removed every possible remain, Maggie returned to the front seat with a face that said, "If you'd only given me more time before we left the house this could have been avoided," Evie slept in the back seat thanks to a nursery rhyme CD, and we continued on.

At this point I was annoyed, but not so furious or put out that I wanted to do harm to Maggie or to myself. After all, I should have given her more time before we left. It wasn't until later that morning, inside Kohls, that I began to wonder why I was still smelling Maggie's poo. I went to grab a coupon from my purse and discovered Maggie had also left me a little present inside. That's right, I'd left my purse open in the floor of the passenger seat and it had not escaped her attention. Honestly, had I not just paid to have a stocking embroidered "Maggie" she might still be with the groomer.

When I told Andrew he said that Providence had interviened since I was planning to take his car that morning but changed my mind at the last minute.