Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Rule #99: Don't Count Your Chickens...

Baby Watch 2008 Update:

Hurricane Evie has stalled out over the Gulf and has been downgraded to a tropical storm. Laura has been having the occasional contraction every couple of hours, but nothing to get excited about.

Laura is working at my school today and I hope she doesn't go into labor during one of her classes, although that would make for interesting afternoon announcements: "The soccer team plays today at 5:00 and Mr. Stacy, your wife's water just broke."

We are going with the spicy-food-wives'-tale for inducing labor. So far we've gone with chicken tortilla soup from McCallister's, Taco Bell (probably did more harm than good), Moe's (Welcome to Moe's!), and an Italian pizza from Luchessi's. If we lived in Brentwood we would be at Swanky's with the Lipscombs. I've googled "natural labor inducing methods" and some of the results are disturbing. Aaron, do you have any legitimate medical suggestions?

Next doctor's appointment is Thursday. Time to hurry up and wait. Stay tuned.

8 comments:

JDL said...

I read Eggplant Parmesean does the trick, i'll try to dig up a link.

JDL said...

http://www.scalinis.com/Bambino.htm

ayyyyeeee, the bambino!

Jones said...

For natural inducing methods contact Landon, however I am not sure how excited Laura will be about his ideas.

I read Nunley's comment on your last post and it sounds like he is just desperate to use his skit bag again.

Here are some ideas to occupy your time while you are waiting on the hurricaine:

1. Take something that will simulate a child to the grocery store (a small goat should do).

2. Get a bag of flour and set your alarm to go off every half hour, when it goes off get up and bounce the sack in your arms.

3. practice feeding a baby, get a watermelon,cut a hole one inch in diameter in the mellon, tie it to the ceiling and swing it, carefully spoon the baby food into the melon until all is gone.

4. to practice putting clothes on a child go to your pet store and buy a small octopus, attempt to put the entire octupus in a loose mesh bag with all tentacltes in the bag.

Aaron said...

Walking, walking, walking and uh...doing what you did together to bring you to this point is supposed to sometimes work as well. But I haven't seen any evidence based clinical trials about that.

Jones said...

Also, if you have an extra bag of petocin (SP?) around the house set her on an IV drip.

Andrew said...

Thanks for all the suggestions.

Seth, your spelling is fast approaching Nunley-ness.

Tentacles=Tentacltes? You've been in public education too long.

Jones said...

I am a math man, I still get a stomach ache when I thnk back to middle school spelling tests. However, if you want to have a discussion on finite dimentional vector spaces I am your man.

JDL said...

I agree with Jones, Nunley is trying to have the Deranged Postman make an appearance on your reports.

You could always look up "Chocolate Rain" on Youtube....the little girl will come right on out to get away from the duck voice of Tay Zonday.